You gotta lose your mind in Detroit Rock City

Michigan: First line of defense against the Canadians

I get to spend a couple of days up here in Michigan this week. I figured I would celebrate this with a few "truths" about the area up here.

Q: Where was O.J. hiding right before the famous white Bronco chase?
A: On the University of Michigan campus. That's the last place you would find a football player.

Q: Why do University of Michigan fans keep their diplomas on their dashboards?
A: So they can park in handicap spaces.

Two University of Michigan fans were walking down the street when they came upon a dog lying on the sidewalk licking and cleaning his groin like dogs do. The first University of Michigan fan says to the second, "Boy, I wish I could do that." The second University of Michigan fan replies, "Yeah, me too. But I wouldn't try it." The first University of Michigan fan asks, "Why not?" The second University of Michigan fan replies, "Because I'm afraid the dog might bite me."

Dumb Michigan Laws

A woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair without her husband's permission.

There is a 10 cent bounty for each rat's head brought into a town office.

It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got hurt in your house.

You may not swear in front of women and children in the state of Michigan.

Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony.

Couples are banned from making love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple's own property.

Willfully destroying your old radio is prohibited.

It is illegal for a man to scowl at his wife on Sunday.

Alligators may not be tied to fire hydrants.

It is illegal to let your pig run free in Detroit unless it has a ring in its nose. According to history and animal husbandry, it prevents them from "rooting" in the ground for their food.



And in honor of Detroit and upcoming Halloween....